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#319012 - 08/05/2013 CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot

Shanga

Major General
Registered: 12/01/2000
Posts: 7866
Loc: Danubia


CONGRATULATIONS TO SLAX, THE WINNER OF OUR CONTEST

The contest is over, but we're opening the topic again, just for fun this time. If you feel inspired, post your liners, this time without any restrictions.



Edited by Shanga (24/05/2013)
_________________________
Just wanted again to step by and say thanks. That is so infuckingcredible. awefuckingsome. Unbeshitliveable. (JAFTeam)
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#319014 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
Thanks Shanga!

This contest is open to all members of The Bear's Pit JA Community who are Jagged Alliance: Flashback backers (registration is free, try it!).

As you can see, there's a $220 pledge on Kickstarter and it's yours for the taking! If JA:F succeeds, this account is eligible to receive:

Quote:
NEW PLEDGE REWARDS ADDED BY FC 5/10/2013
  • Website credit list
  • Digital Download of Jagged Alliance Classic Pack
  • Digital download of PC, Mac OSX or Linux DRM-free
  • Digital high quality map of the game world
  • Digital copy of the Official Soundtrack
  • Get your name in the NPC name pool and write a simple short response
  • Early Access to the game (min 1 week before)
  • Digital Documentary of the making of JAF
  • Digital tactics manual
  • Digital JAF art book
  • Access to the Beta version of the game
  • An exclusive in-game vanity item
  • Collector forum badge for the official JAF forum
  • Behind the scenes access to developer forum
  • The exclusive Backer T-shirt (physical)
  • Your name in the "special thank you!" credits roll
  • Boxed collector's Edition (physical)
  • You get to choose to write either an enemy response or a mercenary one-liner

But wait, there's more! This pledge will also be eligible for The Bear's Pit FROM MODDERS TO BACKERS contest for an ultra cool custom blackshirt in the JA2 1.13 mod.

HOLY MOLY THERE'S STILL MORE UPDATE: Announcing new stretch goals for this contest!

Given how few entries there have been to date, I'm throwing in stretch goals. From post #319738 forwards, I need more pledgers (double entries count to this tally!):

10 new entries: Backer T-shirt Add-on added ($20 added)
20 new entries: Alpha Access Add-on added ($40 added)
30 new entries: Alpha + Dog Tag with Special Mercenary unlock added ($70 added)
(postage applies, but it already did with the CE box)
50 new entries: ????


To enter the competition, you must submit in this thread:
1) An enemy response
2) A mercenary one-liner

Given the early state of the game, any canonical JA/JA2 mercenary can be used for now to give us some context for this one-liner smile

I've asked Shanga, R@S and DepressivesBrot to pick for me their favorites. If it's a three-way tie I'll pick my favorite from their pool, otherwise their majority nominee wins. They should send me their votes 48 hours before the KS campaign closes (I'll remind them). If I don't get a vote from any of them by the time I need to announce the winner, I'll fill in my own on their behalf tongue

Terms and conditions (VERY IMPORTANT)
1) This contest is only open to confirmed JA:F KS backers. Sorry I don't have access to FC's PayPal list nor do I intend to bother them about it so if you pledged by PayPal my apologies, I'm sure Shanga will make you a nice sadbear meme as consolation.
2) To prove your backer status, you must private message me a screenshot of your pledge (like the one above). You don't have to show the amount, but all pledges $75 and above will get two entries in this contest and I will confirm it in thread if I'm satisfied that they're eligible. You now only need to submit your screenshot to collect the prize OR if you want to be counted in the $75+ tier for two entries
3) The winner will be announced here, 24 hours before the close of the KS campaign.
4) However, the winner will only receive the access details to this account AFTER the pledges are locked in following the close of the KS campaign (where I can easily see if you kept your pledge after it closed)
5) His (her) ability to claim his prize due from the pledge is not my problem. Shipping is not my problem. Working out the mechanics with FC on your one-liner is not my problem (if you choose not to use your one-liner to send to FC I don't care!) I only hand you the keys, and a Kickstarter account with $220 deducted from my credit card. The winner is solely responsible for immediately changing the email and password associated with the account so that FC contact the right person when it comes to follow-up.
6) This contest has no relation to Full Control, Jagged Alliance: Flashback or Kickstarter. It is a fan-made project to boost some publicity and you participate in this spirit. By submitting your entry you agree that the pledge is bound by the terms of the KS campaign and I bear no responsibility for any future issues with claiming your pledge rewards from Full Control or Kickstarter.
7) This pledge is subject to the full terms and conditions of the Jagged Alliance: Flashback Kickstarter campaign. So if the campaign fails, well you get a nifty KS account that says you backed this awesome campaign and that's it.

May the best one-liners win![b][/b]


Edited by gdalf (15/05/2013)
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#319015 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
The closing date for this contest is 48 hours before the close of the Kickstarter campaign, that is Tuesday May 21, 5:59pm EDT.

I will do my best to announce the winner at least 24 hours before the close of the campaign (Wednesday)
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#319016 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
UPDATE: Please include your KS nickname for confirmation purposes in your PM or screenshot. You may also send me your screenshot by email (gdalf at live dot com) but PM me to confirm anyway because it might get stuck in the spam box.

Q: Do the lines have to be in order?
A: It doesn't matter as long as we know which is which! Note that the final pledge only gives you the option for one or the other. So you can make them a dialogue if you like, or not. Be creative!

Q: Do we need to add context?
A: It's entirely up to you! Using a known merc is just a suggestion to take a shortcut so you don't have to explain the joke

Q: Why do you need my screenshot and nickname that's so unfair!!
A: It is to be fair to people who really pledged that everyone is playing by the same rules.

Q: Have you got my screenshot? Is my entry accepted?
A: I will compile the full set of entries each week and just before the contest closes. If yours isn't in there, then no, it failed to meet the requirements. You will also receive a reply confirmation to your PM.

To give an idea about how your one-liner is likely to be read, here are a few sample events that triggered one-liners in JA2:
  • Selected
  • Moved
  • Enemy spotted
  • Many enemies spotted
  • Killed an enemy
  • Enemy head exploded
  • Accomplished a task
  • Failed a task
  • Leveled/skilled up
  • Asked for improved contract
  • Renewed contract
  • Saw a rotting corpse
  • Found some loot
  • Gun jammed
  • Out of ammo


Edited by gdalf (10/05/2013)
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#319018 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Shanga

Major General
Registered: 12/01/2000
Posts: 7866
Loc: Danubia
Here's my entry (out of contest) to break the ice:

Merc one liner: "This damn gun is useless! Where is the XML file for it?"
Enemy: "Oh shit... not the BANHAMMER!"


I know, out of context and un-usable, but I had to have my fun. widegrin


Edited by Shanga (08/05/2013)
_________________________
Just wanted again to step by and say thanks. That is so infuckingcredible. awefuckingsome. Unbeshitliveable. (JAFTeam)
Top
#319039 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
My sample entry:

Enemy: Let's give them a warm Christobalian welcome... very, very warm

Merc (saw a corpse): Hey look what he had for lunch!
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#319047 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Bivol
corporal
Registered: 07/05/2013
Posts: 34
Merc (Killed an enemy): I thought the Flash Gordon film was bad, but this guy was even worse.
Merc (End of Contract): Everything has an end, only sausages have two.

Enemy: If you wish to be killed, kill.
Enemy: There stands the shadow of a worthy enemy.
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#319064 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Bivol]

lockie
Slasher of Threads ;-)
Major General
Registered: 13/02/2006
Posts: 7010
Loc: Scotland
Enemy ; My sister shoots better than you ! (Taunt)

Merc ; Chaaarrrggge . (enemy sighted)


Enemy ; Do you kiss your mother with that mouth ? taunt)
Merc ; Oh Ohh ,no lead for the pencil !! (out of ammo)

ok taunts don't count I suppose , some replacements then .

Merc : one down , lots to go ! ( killed an enemy)
Merc : would ya look at all them flies ! (rotting corpse)




For free to FC .


Click to reveal..
Rotting Corpse
Guess he won't be home for dinner .
Somebody cover that up .

Gun jammed
Stoopid piece a Chinese crap
Army must a bought this piece a junk at a dollar store .
Jammed ! That makes me mad.

Out of ammo
Anyone lend me some lead ?
The NRA wouldn't have this problem !
I knew I should a stopped at the store .

Enemy spotted
Gook alert !
Hey , who's that ?
Psst , quiet now .

Many enemies spotted
Don't like the looks of them
Come one , come all !
Let's get ready to rumble .

Killed an enemy
Aww , he didn't get to say goodbye .
Byeee !

Head exploded
Would ya look at that !
Hey , don't lose your head , man !
Oooh , splat !





Edited by lockie (13/05/2013)
_________________________
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder .

smile
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#319088 - 08/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Lepidosteus
sergeant
Registered: 02/11/2007
Posts: 131
Loc: Land of Buns.
Merc (Steroid?) kills someone with a flamer or molotov:

"Liar liar FACE ON FIRE!"

(shamelessly lifted from FC3: Blood Dragon)

Enemy response -

When an enemy kills a merc:
"If only the great Major Dolvich could see me now!"


Edited by Lepidosteus (09/05/2013)
_________________________
You know, they never find Hurl, da cry crybaby, Cutter.
I feed him to my dog! He make dog sick too.
She is Evil!
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#319100 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Lepidosteus]

DerekBP
staff sgt
Registered: 15/04/2010
Posts: 172
Merc
shot by friendly fire: Stupid bastard!

finds some cool/great/unique new weapon (like best sniper in a game or rocket rifle or similar): My precious…

low intelligent merc spots a trap: Uuuu a shiny object!

spotting enemy/multiple enemies during night ops: A the children of the night!

funny merc (peronality) spotting mine: Oopsy daisy!

bodybuilding merc gets shot: Damn hypocrites!

showoff merc gets shot: Can’ believe it, just can’t freaking believe it!

kill with head exploding: Take cover! (laughs)

kill with head exploding: What was that all about?! (laughs)

sees enemy: Looks like we’re not in Kansas anymore.

under suppression fire: It’s like my divorce all over again.

wounded: This was uncalled for. I mean rally.



Enemy

hearing noise: What the f…?

asking to surrender: This is plain pointless, just give up.

under suppression fire: Mommy!

taunt: Come on, make my day.


Shanga: Read the contest rules before you post. You can submit ONE MERC LINE + ONE ENEMY LINE. If you pledged more than $75 you can submit TWO of each. Keep the ones you think are best and edit out the rest to qualify. If you have questions, use the Feedback topic.


Edited by Shanga (09/05/2013)
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#319107 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Slax
Sergeant Major
Registered: 16/07/2006
Posts: 1279
Loc: Finland
Enemy torn to shreds by merc auto fire: Makin' bacon'. (Hahahahaha!)

Enemy runs up and pulls a knife: Let's dance, baby!

Pledged $25 just now.
_________________________
Install JA2, unpack latest, overwrite, play.
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#319110 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Stoibs
Civilian
Registered: 09/05/2013
Posts: 1
Loc: Australia
Merc Regaining consciousness/Fully Bandaged from a wound:
..ugh, looks like I'm
(/put's sun goggles on)
Back in Action.


Enemy Spots Merc:
In soviet Russia, I SHOOT YOU!
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#319111 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Grim
sgt 1st class
Registered: 15/07/2006
Posts: 249
Loc: France
Merc (the greedy/envious type) (Found some loot):
Woohoo! Got this one got this one! C'm'on, 5 seconds rule man!

Merc (badly hurt):
Feelin'... Woozy. Gimme a little catnap and i catchya in no...time <Faints>

Ennemy response:
Get lead, you soldier of misfortune!

Ennemy answer from a drug dealer, with some Cuban slang:
Sapingos here! Get the shit out! Dale marimberos!


Edited by Grim (15/05/2013)
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#319114 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
Hey guys, gentle reminder: I need the screenshot of your pledge too. No screenshot, your entry doesn't count. So far I've only received Bivol's and he is indeed confirmed for 2 entries
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#319166 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

bilbo1973
Civilian
Registered: 04/07/2011
Posts: 1
Out of ammo - "Well's dry!"

Enemy spotted/or Many enemies spotted: "Go for the eyes Boo! Arghhh"

(stolen but Legend -wait for it- ary!!!)


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#319185 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
UPDATE: Please include your KS nickname for confirmation purposes in your PM or screenshot. You may also send me your screenshot by email (gdalf at live dot com) but PM me to confirm anyway because it might get stuck in the spam box.
Top
#319187 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

batanen
private 1st class
Registered: 01/05/2013
Posts: 19
[A merc who loves activating burst fire by himself fires a gun without burst] A piece of @&#% gun without burst!
[Enemy negotiates mercs to surrender with diplomatic skills] Surrender now! No one will be spared, nonetheless!

EDIT: Tripled my pledge so here are more:
[Entering enemy zone] Sidney: Bloody hell. We're back in action.
[Enemy notices mercs] Hey! It's the Bear's Pit reinforcements!


Edited by batanen (12/05/2013)
_________________________
FC:
- JA is Hardcore. And it won't be a pony-game.
- This proposed project is based on re-using the old JA2 mechanics and wrapping it into a new story. So its time for fans of THAT approach to come out of the bushes. Besides the ones already here :-)
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#319188 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Thor
Sergeant Major
Registered: 17/02/2007
Posts: 1440
Loc: Belgium
One for free (to give some atmosphere & direction):

After battle: "Alright, now let's chop of their heads and play some ball..."


Edited by Thor (09/05/2013)
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#319226 - 09/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Siresmithnj
corporal
Registered: 11/03/2004
Posts: 25
Loc: NY
Enemy (engaging Merc) - Chyort voz'mi!
Merc (engaging Merc) - This is where we fight! This is where they die!

A.Smith <- Kickstart name


Edited by Siresmithnj (13/05/2013)
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#319249 - 10/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Ryan_Prime
private
Registered: 15/10/2007
Posts: 9
Merc (after a successful action or kill):
That one was for the Gipper.

Enemy (generic battle cry):
For the Permanent Revolution!
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#319277 - 10/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Jondera
Civilian
Registered: 14/04/2013
Posts: 2
Loc: WI
Merc (Young Sidney, or other British merc, on arrival in a sector with a bar): "Ey, there's a pub here, can we stop off for a pint before we get back to the shooting?"

Enemy (Drug cartel/crime ring thug): "Just couldn't mind your own damn business, could you?"


Edited by Jondera (11/05/2013)
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#319284 - 10/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

R@S
sgt 1st class
Registered: 13/07/2004
Posts: 208
Loc: Sweden
If you want my vote, you should consider merc nationality and colloquial expressions.

A few examples(feel free to steal or re-work them as you please):

Canadian spot trap
Shit on a hockey-stick!

Southern affirmative
Git 'er done!

Scottish close call action
Ach, I've got sheit doon mae threws!

Russian insult at kill
I get your Zhopa! (ass)


Edited by R@S (10/05/2013)
_________________________
Nullus Anxietas

Blue Sun Mod for 7.62 High Caliber
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#319292 - 10/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Colcut
Civilian
Registered: 10/05/2013
Posts: 1
Blows enemy heads of
Merc - Well that's one for the highlight reel.

Enemy - I've got a surprise with your name on it
Killing a merc - Surprise!
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#319401 - 12/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

zeroreality
Civilian
Registered: 12/05/2013
Posts: 1
Enemy "I'd call you a cunt but you lack both the depth and the warmth."

Merc - Accomplished a task "If it's stupid, but works, then it's not stupid."


Now that's just stupid ! Keep it clean .


Edited by lockie (14/05/2013)
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#319406 - 12/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
Hi guys, please note the change in rewards - your pledge is now eligible for the extra-cool FROM MODDERS TO BACKERS contest (no I'm not really going to steal this reward for me too hehe).

And a gentle reminder as always, need your screenshots for your entry to count!
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#319420 - 12/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Hrodger
Civilian
Registered: 12/05/2013
Posts: 4
ENEMY heavily wounded: “Tell everyone to NOT publish my novels.”
MERC (psychotic type) hearing something: “Not just in my head, these sounds… surely?”
ENEMY nearly missed by merc: "I get a warm feeling on the inside of my leg."
ENEMY sees merc: "Un mercenario criminal!"

*edit: replaced my first attempt at the enemy response with a (hopefully) better one.
*edit2: going for something simpler now, a short enemy response that might actually be usable.
*edit3: Technically not a one-liner, so I post this one just for fun:

MERC (local guide with heavy accent) when entering the Bear’s Pit: “People name this Bear’s Pit. Animals no want honey here. Bears hunt game and chew very, very long.”


Edited by Hrodger (19/05/2013)
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#319434 - 12/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

H_412
corporal
Registered: 22/10/2009
Posts: 32
Merc renewing contract: "I can't believe they're actually payin' me for this."
Merc taking fire: "I got the aggro!"

Enemy fleeing: "Dishonour before death!"
Enemy spots merc: "El Diablo! I will destroy you with my prayers. And a little firepower!"



Joke entry
Merc destroys tank: "I am Dave Exclamation-mark Yognaught, and I have the BALLS!"
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#319452 - 12/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: lockie]

EXos
sergeant
Registered: 19/09/2009
Posts: 137
Originally Posted By: lockie
Quote:
Scottish close call action
Ach, I've got sheit doon mae threws!


Hahah , laughed ma arse off !

Ach , ah've shat ma drawers ! tongue


Drawers? Trousers? shocked Where's the Kilt!!! shocked
_________________________
Originally Posted By: Jager
I don't want to play another game, I just want to have a better chess board.

Taken from the JaggedAllaince.com forums Anti RTwP thread
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#319557 - 13/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: lockie]

R@S
sgt 1st class
Registered: 13/07/2004
Posts: 208
Loc: Sweden
Originally Posted By: lockie
Hahah , laughed ma arse off !

Ach , ah've shat ma drawers ! tongue
I'm with EXos here! WTF, lockie, I thought you were a true Scotsman and went commando tongue

And a few more tips on the contest, I think/suspect many of the natives and potential enemies will speak Spanish, so be creative here. Use words as Bruja, coño, Pendejo, cabrón and hijo de perra.

Sorry for the coarse language, but I want some spice in this game smile
_________________________
Nullus Anxietas

Blue Sun Mod for 7.62 High Caliber
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#319560 - 13/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Peal
master sgt
Registered: 09/08/2007
Posts: 265
Loc: Germany
Good Point.
_________________________
http://www.taktikzone.de/
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#319603 - 14/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Peal]

lockie
Slasher of Threads ;-)
Major General
Registered: 13/02/2006
Posts: 7010
Loc: Scotland
have you ever been to Scotland in February ... even now it's damn cold and windy , not a good combination for a kilt wearing commando smile
_________________________
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder .

smile
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#319675 - 14/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Voyevoda
sergeant
Registered: 26/04/2009
Posts: 106
Loc: Germany, Darmstadt
I like to bring back the Cold War. tongue

Merc: (a russian)
(after an American Merc had a Multikill)
"You can always count on Americans to do the right thing, after they've tried everything else."
-Winston Churchhill, but fits just perfectly.

Merc: (an american)
(after a russian Merc injured an allied or failed with something else)
"The Russian History remains a book of blunders."

Enemy:
(If multiple enemys get killed together)
"Bunch of Idiots, how often i told you not to stay together in a firefight!"

Enemy:
(After killing a Merc)
"Are you ok?"
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#319688 - 14/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Voyevoda]

Arulcish_Lion

master sgt
Registered: 06/01/2013
Posts: 264
Loc: Saint-Petersburg, Russia
Originally Posted By: scope100
Merc: (a russian)
(after an American Merc had a Multikill)
"You can always count on Americans to do the right thing, after they've tried everything else."
-Winston Churchhill, but fits just perfectly.
I'm sorry. But I'll hardly believe that he's Russian merc.
He loves Americans too much and speaks English too good.
Cold War. wink
_________________________
Welcome to Metavira.
Night Ops team.
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#319722 - 15/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Arulcish_Lion

master sgt
Registered: 06/01/2013
Posts: 264
Loc: Saint-Petersburg, Russia
I'll try too.

Russian merc (sees American or just another merc, who is not very honored by Russian merc, or after the action of such a merc):
"Are you working today, or barely-barely again?"

Warlike npc/enemy, who is Russian before attacking mercs:
"Take of your pants, we'll get acquainted with you."

Click to reveal..
Based on real colonel.


Edited by Arulcish_Lion (15/05/2013)
_________________________
Welcome to Metavira.
Night Ops team.
Top
#319738 - 15/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: gdalf]

gdalf
Corporal 1st class
Registered: 03/05/2013
Posts: 93
UPDATE: Announcing new stretch goals for this contest!

Yes, stretch goals. But first, the boring part: I'm not going to ask everyone for their pledge screenshots up front anymore (but you should PM them to me if and only if you are above $75 and you want two entries). Instead, in line with the other contest at Bear's Pit, you only have to submit them to me after the KS closes in order to collect (and it must show that you pledged after the contest closed, and your KS nickname).

Given how few entries there have been to date, I'm throwing in stretch goals. From this post forwards, I need more pledgers (double entries count to this tally!):

10 new entries: Backer T-shirt Add-on added ($20 added)
20 new entries: Alpha Access Add-on added ($40 added)
30 new entries: Alpha + Dog Tag with Special Mercenary unlock added ($70 added)
(postage applies, but it already did with the CE box)
50 new entries: ????


Edited because I realised the beta access already comes with the $220 pledge, and also coz irn00bie and didn't know how add-ons work.


Edited by gdalf (15/05/2013)
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#319783 - 15/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Hyrax
private 1st class
Registered: 06/05/2013
Posts: 21
Loc: Harjumaa
Merc (after killing): One more for Valhalla

Merc (seeing too many enemies): are YOU serious?

Enemy (seeing merc): &#1087;&#1088;&#1080;&#1074;&#1077;&#1090; &#1080; &#1076;&#1086; &#1089;&#1074;&#1080;&#1076;&#1072;&#1085;&#1080;&#1103;

Enemy (about to hit merc): &#1076;&#1091;&#1088;&#1072;&#1082;

Hyrax

Edit: Thx Arulcish_Lion for help with russian letters


Edited by Hyrax (15/05/2013)
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#319786 - 15/05/2013 Re: JA 2/1 Metavira: Questions. [Re: Arulcish_Lion]

Arulcish_Lion

master sgt
Registered: 06/01/2013
Posts: 264
Loc: Saint-Petersburg, Russia
Some help to Hyrax with Russian Letters.

Enemy (seeing merc): привет и до свидания

Enemy (about to hit merc): дурак

Click to reveal..
Google translator?
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#319844 - 16/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Cosmo_Bozo
private 1st class
Registered: 06/05/2013
Posts: 17
Enemy(after being hit) Haa Ha! missed me...oh shit, no you didn't, I'm bleeding!

Merc(outnumbered) GET TO THE CHOPPA!...we did bring a chopper? right?

They'd both be better for mercs really but haven't pledged enough for 2 gos


Edited by Cosmo_Bozo (16/05/2013)
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#319847 - 16/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

JMich
Fighting the XML Editor
first sergeant
Registered: 06/01/2011
Posts: 641
Loc: Greece
Merc (when seeing enemies): Look at them run, like little hamsters.

Enemy (when fleeing): Retreat! They fight like angry bears!
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#319870 - 16/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Winstons
Civilian
Registered: 16/05/2013
Posts: 1
Merc (Upon killing an enemy) - 'If it bleeds . . . we can kill it'

Enemy (Upon spotting a merc) - 'They're coming outta the god damn walls!'


Edited by Winstons (16/05/2013)
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#319871 - 16/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: JMich]

Gambigobilla
first sergeant
Registered: 01/07/2008
Posts: 586
Originally Posted By: JMich
Merc (when seeing enemies): Look at them run, like little hamsters.

Enemy (when fleeing): Retreat! They fight like angry bears!

this!
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#319911 - 17/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Bearpit

captain
Registered: 29/08/2001
Posts: 3896
Loc: Sydney Australia.

" We are here for the violent revolution of truth, it's a lot more fun than the silent version "

Comrade Che Bearvara.
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#319914 - 17/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Faia
Civilian
Registered: 17/05/2013
Posts: 1
Jedi enemy requesting surrender:
You don't want to fight anymore. You want to give up and get yourself arrested.

Merc selected:
At your service ...when i feel like it.
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#319916 - 17/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

madmat3001
Civilian
Registered: 17/10/2009
Posts: 2
Loc: Berlin, Germany
OK, let me take a shot. I'm not very creative when it comes to stuff like this, so I figured everybody in the late 80's would be quoting popular movies from the 70's and early 80's. (Also: I like to quote movies ^^)

I have so far pledged $115, so I'll do two entries. PM is coming shortly.

Merc1: "I think we're gonna need a bigger boat..."
From: Jaws
When the squad finds a small / shoddy boat. This might be too situational.

Merc2: "I'm a god damm marvel of modern science!"
From: One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest
When he succeeds at something special / hard.

Enemy1: "Do you feel lucky? Well, do you, punk?"
From: Dirty Harry
Anytime, I guess.

Enemy2: "I love the smell of napalm in the morning!"
From: Apocalypse Now
After surviving a granade / explosion.

Actually all of these could very well be Merc one liners, imo.

Bonus:
From the "unlikely department", but this would make me so happy: We need two Mercs "Snowman" and "Bandit". When they are on the same team, they sometimes have this exchange:

Snowman:"Why are we doing this? They said it couldn't be done."
Bandit:"That's why we're doing it."

From: Smokey and the Bandit
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#319922 - 17/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: madmat3001]

Sam_Hotte
lt
Registered: 10/03/2009
Posts: 2215
Loc: Middle of Germany
Originally Posted By: madmat3001
From the "unlikely department", but this would make me so happy: We need two Mercs "Snowman" and "Bandit". When they are on the same team, they sometimes have this exchange:

Snowman:"Why are we doing this? They said it couldn't be done."
Bandit:"That's why we're doing it."

From: Smokey and the Bandit

Since the names are not mentioned in the quotes, any pair of buddy mercs could have this dialogue as a reference to the movie ... smile
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#320029 - 18/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Mauser
The one who knocks
lt
Registered: 16/08/2006
Posts: 2469
Loc: Bavaria - Germany
Alrighty then, after having pledged my 50$ per PayPal, here´s my contribution:


Merc after headshot or action kill: "Damn, if killing in style was worth money, i´d be rich now!"

Merc after messy kill: "Hehe yeah, my mom/dad always said i was a messy boy/girl!"

Merc firing: "Feast on my hot beans hombre!"

Merc after getting shot/knocked down: "You come a knockin´? I AM THE ONE WHO F***ING KNOCKS!

Merc about to die or in bad mood: "Damn, i wish i was at home right now playing videogames!"

Merc shooting (shotgun): "THIS IS MY BOOMSTICK! YOU LIKE IT PUNK?"

Merc finding stuff: "Nice, big toys for bad boys!"

Merc: "Are you Chuck Norris? Is this me?"

Merc under fire: "Ha! Missed me! I am So gonna go to town on your ass for that!"

Merc spotting enemies: "Spotted some turds. Didn´t know you could stack shit that high!"

Merc after spectacular multikill: "Damn, i deserve a stiff Cocktail and a lapdance with happy ending for that one - and the cleaning lady a BIG tip!"

Merc: "I´ve come to fight for freedom and justice! Money can buy freedom and justice, right?"

Merc getting a cool new gun: "Happiness is a warm, shiny new gun!"

Merc doing something successful: "You know i am good, but ya didn´t know i was THIS good, did ya?"

Merc taunting the enemy: "I am gonna kick your ass so hard, even your ancestors will feel sorry for you!"

Merc seeing large reptiles or other dangerous wildlife: " Damn, Where is Crocodile Dundee when you need him?"

Merc wounding an enemy: "Your cries of pain are the soundtrack of my life!"

Merc: "Today is a good day to die - for YOU comrade!"

Merc critically wounded: "Damn i didn´t sign up for this - oh wait, yes i did!"

Merc going psycho: "I`M GONNA KILL YOU SO HARD, YOU´RE GONNA DIE TO DEATH!"

Psycho merc blowing an enemy up: "Aw shucks! I wanted those ears for my collection!"

Merc after battle looking at the corpses "Well, whatever creepy crawlies live here are gonna feast well tonight!"

Merc taunting: "I hope you had a good breakfast, because tonight you´re gonna dine in hell!"

German Merc killing a Russian: "That one would have made Opa proud!"

German Merc rejecting recruiting or leaving: "If i wanted to work for amateurs, i´d have joined/never left the German army!"

German Merc shooting at Russians: "You know what this is for, Iwan!"


Allright, that´s enough for now. Maybe i can come up with some more until the KS ends.
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#320030 - 18/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

DepressivesBrot
Chief Hamster Herder
captain
Registered: 22/07/2009
Posts: 3825
You know the task is to write ONE merc and ONE enemy line (2 for 75+ pledges) right?


Edited by DepressivesBrot (18/05/2013)
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#320034 - 18/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: DepressivesBrot]

Mauser
The one who knocks
lt
Registered: 16/08/2006
Posts: 2469
Loc: Bavaria - Germany
Originally Posted By: DepressivesBrot
You know the task is to write ONE merc and ONE enemy line (2 for 75+ pledges) right?


Yeah well, i got creative, so just go ahead and pick your favorites. Most of them are applicable to both mercs and enemies and quite universal to any type of character.

Since i couldn´t pledge through KS (i do have an account though), i won´t be able to win anyting anyways, although i have a pic as proof of my PayPal transaction.

So yeah, take it or leave it i guess?
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though I walk thru the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, 'cause I am DEATH INCARNATE!

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#320038 - 18/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Peal
master sgt
Registered: 09/08/2007
Posts: 265
Loc: Germany
A typical Mauser smile
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#320040 - 18/05/2013 Re: CONTEST: Write a merc/enemy one-liner, win a $220 pledge spot [Re: Shanga]

Voyevoda
sergeant
Registered: 26/04/2009
Posts: 106
Loc: Germany, Darmstadt
haha Mauser, nice explosion of inspirations! tongue

And a Paypal-Pledge. Disqualified. xD


Edited by scope100 (18/05/2013)
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